It’s weird being so close to the end. My room has boxes collected on the desk and it has finally hit me that this is reality; I spent nine months out of my life living under a contract which was hard some days, really hard. Looking back from each month to the next there are so many much to think of and my brain is compacted with so many newly learned things. This year was hard for me, living in community was hard because all of my flaws were seen really clear in a new light, but really it was the best thing for me. I have seen how selfish I am and how disobedient I am, and it’s made me really want to pursue a different life, one that has a different standard of right and wrong. Obedience has been one of the biggest lessons for me, Rich always has said “if the little things don’t matter what makes you think the big things will?” I get it now, I really get it. And as it talks about in “The Pursuit of Holiness” God doesn’t overlook any sin, and to me that really hit me. I want to leave Joshua as a woman that wants obedience in all aspects, and I want to do this for God’s glory. I understand the Joshua Wilderness Institute so much more now then I did at the beginning and even up to a few weeks ago. All the rules don’t make you change, but if you train yourself to live with discipline to the rules that are set, it will change you. The staff doesn’t make you change, but if you learn to drop pride and submit even when it seems like it doesn’t matter that is where you will see character growth. Living in community doesn’t change you, but if you really want to be the kind of person we are called to be then you will want to surround yourself with people that wont tell you what you want to hear, and will do this out of love. I think I could make this blog really long because I have so many good things to say and so many memories I would want to write out, but really what this past nine months have really taught me have been obedience and attitude. I want to be Christ-like, and by being obedient and having a good attitude, no matter the circumstances that is the kind of girl I want to be.
And now I will close with something else I have learned this year… “Paul and timothy servants of Christ Jesus to all the saints in Christ Jesus at Philippi together with the overseers and deacons. Grace and peace to you…” just kidding.